[home] [amps] [acoustic guitars] [electric guitars 2] [ bass guitars ] [ p.a.] [wind] [misc]            Musician JOKES page [back] [page 1] [page2] [page 3] [page 4] [page 5] [page 6] [page 7] [page 8] [page 9] [page 10] [page 11] [page 12] [page 13] [page 14] [page 15]                                                                          A young child says to his mother, "Mom, when I grow up I think I'd like to be a musician." She replies, "Well honey, you know you can't do both." Q: What do you call a guitar player with two brain cells? A: Pregnant. Q: What do you call a guitar player that only knows two chords? A: A music critic. Relative minor: A guitarist's girlfriend. Q: – How do you know that there is a singer on your front porch? A: – They can’t find the key and don’t know where to come in. Q: What does it say on a blues singer's tombstone? A: "I didn't wake up this morning..." Q: Why do people play trombone? A: Because they can't move their fingers and read music at the same time. Q: How many trombonists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, but it's the only thing they won't screw. Q: How are musicians like linoleum? A: Lay them once and you can walk on them forever. Q: What's the difference between a guitar player and a large pizza? A: A large pizza can feed a family of four. Q: What has 3 teeth and an IQ of 47? A: The first 4 rows at a Marilyn Manson Concert. Q: – How do you get the musician off your front porch? A: – Pay for the pizza Q: – What do you call a musician that just lost his girl friend? A: – Homeless Q: What's the difference between a jet airplane and a trumpet? A: About three decibels.