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Superior Music           Musician JOKES page 
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Q: What's the difference between an oboe and a bassoon?
A: You can hit a baseball further with a bassoon.
Q: What do you call a beautiful woman on a guitar player's arm?
A: A tattoo.
Q: How does a young man become a member of a high school chorus?
A: On the first day of school he turns into the wrong classroom.
AlQueda has taken 90 accordion players hostage.
If their demands aren't met, they'll release one every hour.
Q: What's the first thing a girl singer does in the morning?
A: Puts on her clothes and goes home.
Q: What's the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a baby elephant?
A: Eleven pounds.
Q: What's the best recording of the Walton Violin Concerto?
A: "Music Minus One"
Q: Why are violinist's fingers like lightning?
A: They rarely strike the same spot twice.
Q: How many trumpet players does it take to pave a driveway?
A: Seven- if you lay them out correctly.
Q: What's the difference between a puppy and a singer-songwriter?
A: Eventually the puppy stops whining.
Q: Why are harps like elderly parents?
A: Both are unforgiving and hard to get into and out of cars.
Q: There are two tuba players sitting in a car. Who's driving?
A: The policeman
Q: Why do clarinetists leave their cases on the dashboard?
A: So they can park in the handicapped zones.
Q: Why did the clarinet player marry the accordion player?
A: Upward mobility.
This trombone player gets hired to play an annual big band gig for good dough on New Years Eve.
At this gig his playing was superb, he read the book quite well and improvised his butt off on the charts.
The band leader was impressed and takes him aside after the show and says to him,
"man, you can really play. we've been needing a good bone player for this new years eve gig for quite
awhile. So, consider yourself hired for next year, and each year after if you want it." 
The trombone player excitedly accepted the praise and the offer, and then tentatively asked: 
"Is it okay if i just leave my horn here?"